As women, we grow up listening to a lot of opinions about ourselves and are told a hundred things that we can do to be the “perfect” mother, daughter, or sister. What happens in the process is that we lose hold on reality and what is really important: Our happiness. Here are some instances of women being reminded the same by their therapists.
1. Therapist: “You realize you’re describing domestic abuse”
Me: “Oh no, he’s never hit me.”
Therapist proceeds to explain emotional, psychological and financial abuse.
Answer Source: Reddit
2. Therapist: “I don’t think you’re happy or know what makes you happy. You’ve spent your whole life trying to make others happy and have never focused on yourself. You’ve worked so hard for a life you can put on a post card (wife, great house and career, etc) but I don’t think you want any of it.”
Me: You’re crazy. Of course I know what makes me happy!
Therapist: Name 5 things.
Me: ….. This conversation made me significantly change my ways and has probably been the single most impactful statement in my entire life. /
She was right.
Answer Source: Reddit
3. “Why do you keep referring to yourself as having anger issues and emotional issues?”
It was the first time I had even considered that the ‘anger’ issues I was told I had from when I was a small child were just my family not wanting to deal with my emotional needs. I’d been gaslit my whole life to think that all of my emotions were unreasonable and ‘extreme’, when they actually weren’t.
Answer Source: Reddit
4. In regards to negative self-talk: “the things that you say about yourself…if your closest friends were depressed and going through a hard time, would you say the same things to them?”
Answer source: Reddit
5. “Whose voice is saying those things?”
She recently told me at the beginning of our sessions I made a lot of negative statements about myself and she asked me that question. I said it’s my voice saying that to me. It’s 16 sessions later and I said something negative and she asked the same question. This time I said the voice is my mum’s. It really helped me realise that all the negative thoughts I have about myself are a product of what I’ve been brought up with. It was completely eye-opening.
Answer Source: Reddit
6. “How would you feel about that situation if a child was present-any child, not anyone’s in particular.”
Made it easier to accept and set my boundaries.
Answer Source: Reddit
7. “Why do you gaslight yourself so much?”
I wasn’t even aware that you could gaslight yourself. Coming to terms with my trauma was difficult. Somedays I still tell myself I’m still just overreacting or remembering it wrong.
Answer Source: Reddit
8. “Do you realize you don’t have post partum depression, but are the victim of an abusive relationship?”
Changed everything for me.
Answer Source: Reddit
9. “Did you know that ‘no’ is a complete sentence?”
Answer Source: Reddit
10. “How can you get better if you still live with your trigger?”
Moved out a month after she asked that.
Answer Source: Reddit
These hit hard.
