In the show high schooler Lily, is perplexed as to why her vagina refuses to cooperate with her. Her hormones are racing, and she wants to do the deed, but she says, “it’s like my vagina has lockjaw”.

It is one of the most common female sexual disorders. During penetration, your pelvic floor muscles spasm and contract uncontrollably if you have vaginismus. Not just intercourse, even inserting a menstrual cup feels exasperating.

Owing to the little discourse that happens about women who are sexually active, they simply assume that discomfort and pain is a part of the process. Sadly, this is just a result of a lack of awareness.

While the exact cause of vaginismus is unknown, it is believed to be primarily a psychological condition. So it’s past time for us to talk about it.

In various cases of vaginismus, there’s a disconnect between the brain and body. The taboo around sex is implanted from a young age, so even when you actively want to have sex, your conditioning drives your body and doesn’t allow it. 

Vaginismus symptoms might occur later in life as a result of bad past sexual experiences, childhood abuse, and sexual trauma.

Coming to the rescue, there are certain intimacy exercises that can help in overcoming the problem.

Pelvic floor exercises

Pelvic muscles should be contracted, held for 5-10 seconds, and then released. Repeat after a short rest (3-5 seconds). You will have more control over your pelvic floor by strengthening it.

Vaginal trainers

Over time, using vaginal trainers or tube-like devices can relax and strengthen the muscles while also reducing the fear associated with sexual penetration.

Indulge into non-penetrative sexual experiences

Sex is more than just penetration. Be intimate with each other before getting things steamy. Explore each other’s body, and if you’re comfortable, consider oral stimulation or even oral sex. If you do chose to try penetration, make sure you have enough of lube and consent. 

Also read: What Is Vaginal Steaming & Why Is Everyone Talking About It