We’re seeing many people come forward and call out toxic masculinity, now more than ever. And while that is great, we rarely seem to discuss what positive masculinity is.
Which is why we had to share this Reddit thread with you all! I mean, let’s get to the next part now. Shall we?
So, here is what people had to say when they shared their thoughts on what positive masculinity is about. Take a look:
1. “It looked like when I went to the gym after being sick all week. The most BUFFED superhuman I see there almost every time I go to work out, walks up to me and says: ‘Where were you bro, I hope you didn’t decide to change gyms?'”
– Ronnylicious
2. “I, a 24-year-old adult male, got lost at night walking to a train station my first time alone in NYC. I walked right up to the two BIGGEST guys I could find on the street, who happened to be boyfriends. I told them that I was lost and nervous and asked them to escort me to the 9th Street PATH station. Their kindness and willingness to further puff up every time someone looked at me made me feel so safe.”
– thefartographer
3. “When I was in high school, I cut my finger and my English teacher only had princess band-aids (she said I had to use one). Then when I had Bio class right after, the guy sitting next to me said my bandaid looked sick and he wanted one too.”
– Anonymous
4. “I don’t know if this is your thing, but one of the best examples of positive masculinity I’ve seen is the men in Lord of the Rings (more so the books than the movies, but definitely the movies as well).
They’re strong, they fight, and they are competent, independent decision-makers who lead well. And they also love and pursue peace and justice, they care for their friends/group, and are willing to do hard, sacrificial things for the greater good. They aren’t cruel or wrathful, they don’t use their power to hurt innocents, and they feel their emotions deeply and willingly. Stereotypically, men are looked at to be leaders, and they’re also expected to be angry, stoic, and physically domineering to get their way, because that makes them a “man”. But their manliness isn’t determined by how much they can be in control or dominate others, it’s determined by how good of a person they can be while using he talents and skills they have specifically as men.”
– arrowbread
5. “Using your assertive, dominant male testosterone to help the elderly put groceries in their car.”
– Mandula123
6. “I think of my dad, who recently had his stepfather pass away. My biological grandpa was a horrible father, never present, extremely selfish, and didn’t put his family first. Mike, the man who I did call grandpa, showed my dad how to care for his family and work hard, but also be willing to give sound advice, be emotionally there for his children, and establish strong connections with them. Without Mike, who demonstrated the true positive masculinity, despite all his faults, my dad wouldn’t be the man he is. When I have issues I go to my dad, who gives the same good advice Mike did. I trust my father, and so do my brothers. Without him, I’d be lost.”
– littleducky08
7. “I think this is huge, engaging positively with your family is always the sign of a good man.”
– i_fuckin_luv_it_mate
8. “My father read the instruction manual that came with my big sister’s first Barbie. It recommended having Barbie put on dresses feet-first so as not to mess up her hair. He duly noted the advice and taught us never to pull a dress over hair that’s already fixed up.”
– thefuzzybunny1
9. “Positive Masculinity lifts other people up to accomplish their best. It says that you can accomplish your goals, and you have everything you need to do so. You can find the contacts, get the equipment, build the skills. It’s teaching someone carpentry, it’s volunteering at the soup kitchen. It’s being a confident, generous, and hardworking in contrast to being strong, successful, or scary.”
– spelingpolice
10. “Respect EVERYONE, not only women. Realizing that suicidal thoughts don’t make you less of a ‘man’, neither does voicing your anxiety or depression, or even feelings. And getting help for them isn’t any less manly either. Showing others that voicing their emotions isn’t ‘fragile.’
– JGruesome
11. “Just generally being secure in yourself and not worrying about whether or not you’re manly enough and instead being yourself.”
– theslader
12. “It took me to long to realize that male emotions are not intrinsically bad. Many previous generations have just used it in terrible ways. You can get upset and defend yourself without messing up everyone’s day. Just be aware and self reflective about your affect those around you and look to improve and communicate. I grew up with many people, especially women, saying that all men are emotional cripples and that any expression of male emotion, other than joy or playfulness, was toxic. This is not the case, the men in their life were just assholes.”
– crackbaby123
13. “Obama has always been my vision of positive masculinity, TBH.”
– Anonymous
14. “Men being allowed to feel emotions other than anger. Men being allowed to cry and be happy without putting on a ‘tough guy’ persona.”
– zebra-eds-warrior
15. “Showing respect to all people. Helping the less fortunate. Being a person people can depend on. Standing up for others.”
– Minimalcharges
16. “Being kind and sensitive to the feelings and needs of those around you; men are often ridiculed for these behaviors, called weak, babyish, etc. But having the courage and strength to do what’s right regardless of society’s pressures is something I think all men can aspire to.”
– NateTSO
We love these examples and words of wisdom shared by people! Much needed, if you ask me.
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