To the naked eye, a pack of wolves is easily distinguishable.
Striding together, alert and agile, they’re seldom alone. From hunting to fending, everything is done in unison. The law of the jungle doesn’t leave much for those who’re all by themselves. If you want to survive, you have to stay united.
Just like wolves, it’s the same for us, humans, too.
Man is, of course, a social animal. Since the time he’s born, he’s constantly looking for companions. Family and friends. Lovers. People who’ll stick with him. Never leave him alone.
But there are some human beings who’re better off alone.
The ones who’ve learnt over time how they don’t need anyone. The ones who’ve learnt not to rely on others, not depend on anyone.
Human equations are probably the trickiest ones on Earth.
On one hand, there’s implicit trust and on the other, there’s constant playing with it. While we promise to stick around till the end of our lives, it doesn’t take us much to walk out on someone.
It’s an irony like no other. A contradiction that we live with.
Whether it is our romantic relationships, family or friends, it’s the same everywhere. There’s love one moment and pain the other. Happiness, one moment, sadness, the other. Not to forget the myriad other feelings we go through every single day.
Yes, to have loved ones around is important.
But when our own emotions are forever dwindling, can we really expect anything from anyone else?
There’s much that’s been said about the importance of having people around us.
Our friends and family are our pillars of support. They give us strength and even if the world is against us, stand tall and proud on our side. They’re the ones we lean on for emotional support. And in times of self-doubt, their belief in us tides us through. They’ve seen us grow and have grown with us.
Then there are our romantic interests. The ones we love with all our heart. The ones who see us at our most naked self. The ones we keep no secrets from. The ones who share our lives.
Needless to say, all of these people are very, very important. So important that we can’t ever imagine living without them. So important that every time someone leaves us, it hurts and how.
However, here’s the bottom line. They leave. Friends leave. Family leaves. Lovers leave.
People leave. Apart from death, that’s the other inevitable in all our lives.
Frankly, it’s unfair to expect someone to stay forever.
Like it or not, friends do outgrow each other. With growing age, come career responsibilities and family needs. It no longer remains just as easy to meet every weekend and party all night. When work takes you to a new city, every few years, it’s difficult to hold on to long, lost bonds.
Yes, your family forever remains your strength but it’s also an unfortunate truth of life that, no matter what, you will outlive your parents. They won’t be there all the time. Nor will be your siblings who’d go on to forge their own paths in life.
As for lovers, if they do become life partners, it is not always a smooth sailing either. It’s not easy making a marriage work. Staying in it when the going gets tough. Trying to make it work.
Relationships of all kinds are tricky and messy. Certainly not easy. Yes, many people manage to make ’em work but then, many don’t!
Won’t it be easy, then, to not expect much?
Life is best lived without expectations from people.
There’s a certain independence in not expecting people to stay with you and stand by you. And no, it’s not as sad and melodramatic as it sounds.
We’re often guilty of confusing loneliness with being alone. You can be the latter without feeling the former. It’s all about feeling complete with your own self. Enjoying your own company and not looking for someone else to give you either strength or support.
You come into this world all by yourself. And rightfully so, you leave it all alone. Between your birth and death, why is it that you’re always seeking support?
If you get a hand to hold on, great. But don’t let that become a need. Don’t let yourself constantly look out for support.
If you need any support, you’re totally capable of giving it to your own self.
Don’t expect a knight in shining armour to sweep you off your feet. Don’t expect your dream girl to walk into your life.
Don’t count on family and friends to always have your back.
Learn to be by yourself. Not lonely but happy in your own company instead.