So many vows. They make you swear and swear. Defend the King, obey the King, obey your father, protect the innocent, defend the weak. But what if your father despises the King? What if the King massacres the innocent?

The pages that are meant to be filled with the deeds of Ser Jaime Lannister are, however, empty. 

Why fill the great deeds of the man who murdered the king he was supposed to protect? 

And that’s okay. Jaime Lannister couldn’t give less of a shit. 

He was knighted by the great Ser Arthur Dayne at the age of 15 after defeating the mad Summer Knight. Cersei Lannister then convinced the Mad King to choose Jaime as a member of the Kingsguard.

This meant that Jaime could never get married or bear children and give up his rightful place as the heir of Casterly Rock. 

And he was okay with that. 

He was prepared to do all he could, to stay with Cersei, the only woman he ever loved. 

And that there was his biggest flaw. 

When we witness him in season 1 and 2, he is a rich, violent and smug knight, son of an influential father. 

Even the good parts about him, his handsomeness, his prowess as a warrior, his pride were used to fight for the wrong cause. 

Here’s Jon Snow’s reaction to seeing Jaime for the first time.

Ser Jaime Lannister was twin to Queen Cersei; tall and golden, with flashing green eyes and a smile that cut like a knife. He wore crimson silk, high black boots, a black satin cloak… They called him the Lion of Lannister to his face and whispered “Kingslayer” behind his back.

Jaime’s redemption began, as we witnessed it, when he came into contact with Brienne. 

Add losing his sword hand to the long list of misfortunes, and we finally see a humble, temperamentally castrated Jaime reveal his true self.

Brienne is a hero figure, a woman worthy of being a knight, rightful in her wrath. But no idiot in Westeros accepts it till Jaime does. 

After being imprisoned, beaten up, bullied and having his hand chopped off, we finally get to see a vulnerable Jaime, naked in bath, speaking to an equally vulnerable Brienne, who despite her naked state is a threat to the most infamous knight of them all. 

It is here that we learn about the truth from the horse’s mouth itself. Forget being knighted at 15 and being in love with Cersei, slaying the king he had sworn to protect is the true origin story of the Kingslayer. 

And it seemed like, for the very first time in more than a decade, Jaime was coming to terms with what he had actually done; save the city. 

And from that day to this day, Jaime has witnessed immeasurable horrors. From the murders of his children, to the naked parading of his paramour, to his brother killing their father. 

And he is the only one who truly understands why each of the events came to pass. He mourns them and yet understands why. And it is this conflict inside him that doesn’t make him go batshit crazy like Cersei. 

When he comes back after reclaiming Riverrun, all he witnesses is the love of his life committing the same crime, he had murdered his previous king for. At this point, you would think he had had enough of Cersei. But no. He sticks with her.

Afterall, he had only loved one woman his entire life. 

And yet, when she tries to stop him from helping Jon Snow and Co. to save the entire world, he gives up. Not on her, I don’t buy that. He gives up on Lannisters and Starks and Targaryens and their endless quarrels.

Because in the end, his greatest crime was and will always be his will to save innocents from burning.