I sometimes feel that dogs know the secret to happiness. The only problem is, they can’t speak. I really wish they could, especially my dog. The guy is in a state of constant happiness and satisfaction and can go from looking sad to “Oh My God, this is the best day of my life!” in the blink of an eye. From what I’ve observed, I think these are the things he would say to me if he could talk;

Dear Person,

1.I can attest to the fact that you’re an excellent hunter, seeing as you regularly feed me tasty num-nums twice a day. So I don’t understand how you can doubt yourself and feel inferior to others. Believe in yourself and keep the num-nums coming.

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2. I really feel you should give hugs to your peoples more often. Since you don’t have a tail like me, it is important to do this so that your peoples know you love them and are happy that they’re around. You might also get a treat or two.

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3. It is important to love your job. You must love it like I love chasing after tennis balls. That’s why I never get tired of doing it. If you like digging holes instead, that’s fine too. Just do something that you like and you’ll be happy.

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4. I have noticed you get bored too quickly. I can understand. You spend most of your time staring at moving squiggly things in your magic mirror. You should go out and run around. Feels awesome. And you’ll never get bored of walks. Because they’re awesome too.

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5. I really think you should stick to a routine. I do. That way, I can always tell when you’re going to come home and wait for you at the door.

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6. I have realized that peoples are like mirrors. When I snarl at them, they get scared and start screaming. When I wag my tail and look happy, they start talking in baby speak which I really really like. I think that if you are nice to your peoples, they will be nice to you.

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7. I can give you classes on being loyal. I am very good at loyalty you know. I’m so loyal, I don’t even eat my food until you come home. It just doesn’t taste the same.

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8. You have to be forgiving to those who you love. Remember that time you hit me? I could have bitten you or growled at you, but I didn’t say anything because I love you and that you didn’t mean it. Later, it was you who came and said sorry and gave me treats. See what I mean?

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9. Don’t be scared of tackling things that scare you. Like me. Even when 5 or 6 dogs come barking at you, I never back down because I am sworn to protect you and your peoples. Because I love you, I get the courage to stand up to them and scare them away.

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10. Don’t take life too seriously, okay? It’s very simple. A cozy place to sleep, tasty num-nums twice or thrice a day, a ball to chase and peoples to love and cuddle with… that’s all you need.

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