DISCLAIMER: We don’t have anything against Bhai’s driver, but considering that Salman Khan is going to blame these mis-tweets on the poor fellow anyway, we thought we might as well give the credit ourselves.
Here are 19 tweets from the official @BeingSalmanKhan Twitter handle. But don’t try to make any sense out of them. Kyunki ek baar jo bhai ne tweet karne ki soch li… uske baad to voh logic ka bhi nahi sochthe!
Everyone’s happy about their first tweet…
Tweetak tweetak tweetiya I lv u .
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) April 23, 2010
Bhai goes berserk.
Tweetar ke do aagey tweetar tweeter ke do peechey tweetar aagey tweetar peechey tweetar arrey bolo kitney tweetar??!!
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) April 26, 2010
He doesn’t let you read his mind. NEVER.
Thinking of tweeting today .
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) May 28, 2014
Bhai’s profound thought for the day…
Thought for the day . Hmmmmmmmm ahhhhhhhhhhh , jaane do aaj kuch mat soocho .— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) June 29, 2014
And sometimes he plays KBC with you!
Jaldi mat jawaab do. Aaraam se, time lay k, sooch samaaj k. Galat jawaab Dena. Ok?
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) March 17, 2015
See? KBC effect!
Fill in the blank. Hv u watched the promo of ……. . ?
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) August 1, 2014
When Bhai is done with his fans, he talks to himself… in creepy English.
Actually I honesty wld wanna b depended on n upon jaise ke Love respect care share trust etc etc God bls n protest us Bus aur kuch nahi.
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) August 14, 2014
Some more creepy language follows which defies all human logic.
Lai bhaari bagaaaa atta , tabartoph manjeh now man , fly la gf bf la ghaoon za , ekta baagh naangta baag pan baagh . Kai ? Lai bhaari
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) July 11, 2014
But Bhai is quick to help his fans…
for those who dont understand hindi should i tweet this in english too ?
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) August 28, 2013
By sending them a ‘female’ id!
Accha sunno twitter aur facebook phe heart patients ka details behjo gay toh confusion hojaeyga so I’m sending u a new female I’d
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) July 29, 2014
Because Bhai believes in spreading love… like a virus.
Jiss jiss ko viral fever nahi hai unn ko bhi pass on kardo, this is a good viral iss se sirf eyes open hoga man n pyar badehga so link up
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) December 13, 2013
Through flies…
Yeh haath mal raha hai ya aap sub ko namaste kar raha hai . pic.twitter.com/ahNneB84NU
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) October 27, 2013
And ants!
How cool is this even ants r playing hockey . U think its promoting our national sport ? pic.twitter.com/29LdMUrrX9
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) October 27, 2013
And just when you thought Bhai could go only thus far… he gives you a deep insight into neglected things in life!
Chai ki pati n patni batao which 1 is pati n which is patni http://twitpic.com/4khafj
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) April 13, 2011
And some really thought provoking logic follows.
Mujhe toh lagta hai , I feel that the earth is round n flat like roti . Haina ? Bolo bolo
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) April 28, 2012
Bhai keeps you posted on the thoughts that trouble him.
Thinking mein bhi takla ho ja oooooon
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) July 27, 2011
And the price of onions, which trouble the whole country.
80 onion’s n 120 daal happy republic day
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) January 26, 2011
But he knows, if Indians can handle his tweets… they can pretty much handle anything in life!
Hindustan k peoples mai hai bada dum VANDE MATARAM .— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) January 26, 2015
After all what choice does Salman Khan leave you with?
honest opinions, healthy criticism r wl cm, batameezeee ka koi role nahi yahaan, twitter mein guss ke bhi chamat maar sakta hun Koi shak?
— Salman Khan (@BeingSalmanKhan) August 2, 2013