We know he’s the serious type because…

*animatedly typing into a laptop*

and

*stubbing cigarettes in an ash-tray*

Also, he has a *VERY* specific job title at National Geographic.

For some reason the *Tiger Expert* has a large collection of snakes. Maybe, because you can’t roll on the floor with a tiger and make women drool.

Then we meet this hip ‘Dalhi’ group which includes Vivek Anand Oberoi, Lara Dutta, Kushal Punjabi and Vishal Malhotra.

Vivek Anand’s response to everything is ‘cut the crap’. Something everyone has been saying for his acting career lately.

Gym boy Kushal can’t stop drooling over his automatic gun.

Disney boy Vishal Malhotra is apparently supposed to play the ‘funny guy’ of the group.

Sanskari Lara Dutta who obviously doesn’t have her priorities set.

They meet a character called Bagga, who promises to show them a ‘good time’ in a nearby national park.

And the ‘Dalhi dudes’ live up to their reputation.

After negotiating for some time, they get their entry.

And they meet serious journalist and his wife (Esha Deol).

Complying with its ‘Dalhi’ roots, the film also has a road rage scene. In the middle of the fucking jungle.

Any way, this ensures all the Bollywood buddies finally meet. And they make their way to the guest house. Where they meet tour-guide, Pandey.

The next morning they find him dead. Beheaded. The police tell the actors to GTFO of the jungle.

But ‘Dalhi boy’ being ‘Dalhi boy’, one of them goes into a core area.

Meanwhile his gang comes looking for him. And are greeted by Kali, a local who (for some reason) has highlights in his hair.

They discover gym boy’s headless body.

They’re all asked to leave immediately, but being the good-hearted idiots they are, they stay back longer to mourn their friend’s death.

It ends in a deadlock, and *finally* they decide to run for their lives. There’s a landslide, which means they can no longer take the usual way out. That’s when Kali appears again.

While trying to drive on a rickety bridge, Disney boy loses his shit.

And obviously fucks it up with his stupidity. Not before dying in a pure Final Destination fashion.

With only the A-list actors remaining, they resume on foot. And when they reach an abandoned house, Kali’s only instruction to them is – don’t go near the well.

Guess what Esha Deol does, while others are sleeping?

She dies, obviously. But that’s when a MAJOR plot reveal happens. Kali’s reflection isn’t visible in the well.

DAYUMMMM! He’s an aatma! He’s the one bumping peeps left, right and centre.

Running away from this singularly bad thriller-turned-horror movie.

Let’s do what we came here to do. Star in a Dharma music video.

Fin.

Design Credits: Ashish Kumar