Can you imagine what would happen if there was a zombie outbreak in India? For one, there are a billion of us, so all hell will break loose. But if you intend to survive, you might just want to check out these 10 survival tips.
1. Take up cricket
All that practice will help when you use your cricket bat to crack zombie skulls. Sachin Tendulkar will become Conan The Barbarian at this or something.
2. Avoid crowded places
Crowded places like Chandni Chowk and Colaba will become freaking death-traps.
3. Head for the hills
Better still, head for Manali.
4. Get a solid set of wheels
You’ll need some sturdy transport. Like an SUV or something. Delhiites will find this one easy.
5. Start getting some exercise
You’ll be doing a lot of running, so it makes sense to start building up your stamina. And no, Yoga doesn’t count.
6. Do NOT get bitten
This goes without saying, but we thought we’d say it anyway. You can prevent this by not acting like Sunny Deol when you see a bunch of zombies. Yeah, that should do it.
7. Pick your survival buddy wisely
Don’t team up with an asshole. For example, if you pair up with K.R.K, you’ll be dead before you can say “2 Rs. people.” Pick someone like Daryl Dixon, zombie hunting bad-ass.
8. Look for military cantonments
They’ll be well stocked, heavily defended and mostly welcoming to anyone who isn’t drooling blood from their mouths.
9. If you run into Yo Yo Honey Singh’s zombie, play one of his songs.
He’ll get distracted. Then, you can do the needful.
10. And if you find yourself in this scenario, scream. Scream like a little girl. Maybe it’ll scare the zombies off.
