Having the painters in. Red beard’s toothpaste. And the one we hear most commonly, “I’m down.” We insist on calling our period anything but our period, because somehow we’ve been taught that menstruation is dirty and shameful, and a taboo. Which is ridiculous, because it happens to 50% of the world’s population, and is a perfectly normal thing that comes (almost) every month. And what’s more ridiculous about all these euphemisms is that none of them make sense. In fact, there’s even an online dictionary detailing a huge list euphemisms used over most of the English-speaking world. We decided to illustrate 15 of the most-used euphemisms to show you exactly how they sound, and why it’s time to retire them.
Period = Ocean?
What’s wrong with the colour? Why do we need to change?
Yeah, I can feel the sharks in there for sure. They’re gnawing at my insides.
I may want tea. My uterus doesn’t.
Wow, calm down uterus. You don’t need to be so sensitive.
My vagina is NOT a monkey.
I spend a lot of money on tampons, don’t call it a rag.
Thank you, but my uterus really doesn’t need a lesson in Communism right now.
Yeah sure, enjoy that drink, while I lie here in pain.
What did Australia ever do to deserve this? Except to just be ‘down under’?
So just get back up.
Who the hell orders this?
Why can’t you just use Colgate??
If I’m weeping, you better be weeping too.
It’s blood, not mud.
So, basically people, let’s just call our period a period.
Bloody brilliant illustrations by Aroop Mishra.