Most women can relate to the idea of men not understanding the concerns we live with. From being catcalled to the different biological experiences we go through, it tough to have a conversation where we’re fully understood and seen. In fact, this Reddit thread where users have shared how out of touch some people are with the female experience is so on point, that you won’t be able to stop nodding in total agreement.
Take a look for yourself:
1. “I always talk about how I love the city at night and how I wish I could take midnight walks. A dear friend said ‘Why don’t you?’ and when I pointed out how dangerous it was his reply was ‘Just don’t take your phone, then you don’t have to worry about being robbed!’“
– chemistfaust·
2. “One time I got up a little too fast while getting something from under a table and hit my boobs while on my way up. My friend panicked and he immediately asked if we needed to go to the emergency room to get checked out. I said no, and asked why he thought so. He thought my breasts would explode and my nipple would fall off to allow the gallons of milk I store to leak.”
3. “My 50 y/o male co-worker invited me (31F) to attend a salsa party with him. I told him that I generally don’t go to places with a lot of men under the influence of alcohol without my fiancée because I don’t want to be dr*gged or SA’d. He then asked me how I could be so arrogant to assume random men would be interested in me enough to go to these lengths to get with me.”
When I responded: ‘I’ve had that happen to me more than once and I don’t want to go through that again’, he started asking me invasive questions about the incidents to determine if HE’d consider the things that happened to me assault. I hit back with the most graphic trauma-dump of what happened to me and made him so uncomfortable that he had to step out for a bit.”
4. “A light hearted one, but I was pretty surprised when men in the office began claiming the women’s bathroom was very fancy, strictly because we had a box of tampons.“
– astandre
5. “My brother legitimately thought women could walk into an obgyn to get a hysterectomy whenever we want if we don’t want kids. LMAO.”
6. “I was being chatted up by two American guys and I brought up the overturning of Roe Vs Wade. Their response? It’s not really a big deal because women can just drive over state lines to get an abortion.”
7. “Pants sizing. I was talking to a male coworker and somehow it came up that women’s clothing sizes are whack. I think I was griping about inconsistent sizing. I mentioned how I wish I could buy pants by the waist and length (like how men’s are sized). He asked ‘Well why don’t you?.’ ‘Because women’s pants aren’t labeled like that,’ ‘Well why don’t you just get ones that are?.’ ‘Because men’s pants are sized like that, not women’s.’ ‘Why don’t you just buy men’s?.’ ‘They don’t fit me right….’So why don’t you buy women’s?,’ ‘I do, that’s the whole point. I wish they were sized in a way that made sense, and not just some arbitrary numbers. I’m different sizes in different brands.’ He just couldn’t understand that women’s pants are cut differently, and that just buying men’s pants wouldn’t work for me.”
– leahs84
8. “My ex-BF was convinced that if a woman miscarried a child, it was because she didn’t truly want the baby, on some deep down level. I still get so mad thinking back to that moment.”
9. “I got my period while hanging out with my then-boyfriend. He said, ‘Why can’t you just use a q-tip?’”
10. “One of the male doctors I went to recently told me ‘You’re 29, not 19 anymore’ to explain my symptoms of extreme pain and fatigue, among other things. I spoke to a female doctor next, she suspects it’s fibromyalgia.”
– Lozt_at_sea·
11. “I wanted to take a Plan B (emergency contraceptive) after having unprotected sex and he said ‘Why don’t we discuss that in a few weeks?’
12. “I was telling a male friend of mine about how I was in an elevator and this creepy guy got on and how uncomfortable I was. My friend loudly exclaimed ‘OMG you’re not the raving beauty that you think you are!‘
– DogMom814·
13. “I’m a trans woman who still dresses like a dude most the time. For a while now, I’ve had both male friends and my boyfriend trying to convince me to ‘Dress more feminine,’ and to ‘Just be myself.’ They don’t understand that I pretend to be a guy for safety reasons, because so much as a feminine jacket can be enough to move me over into female territory as far as strangers are concerned. The worst experience I’ve had was someone trying to kidnap me (thankfully in a stupidly ineffective way), but if I’m wearing baggy guy clothes, I can throw my voice deep enough to convince people I’m just a feminine guy. I think my boyfriend is starting to get it, but said male friends do not.”
How do so many people not understand the obvious fears women live with.