Sorry Stoners! Tourist Entry Into Malana Is Now Banned So Say Goodbye To Malana Cream

Ashish Dutta

Herb

The Gods have spoken. 

And by his word, tourists and travelers traversing into the beautiful town of Malana to score some shall not be able to do so any more. Yes, you read that right. 

The villagers of Malana, after communion with their local deity, Jamlu, have decided to cut all the stoners off. No more will the locals in Malana be a host to the many visitors who come from all over the world to lose themselves to the pleasures of Malana Cream, a strain of cannabis which has high oil content, intense aroma, and an even better high. 

After ”speaking to” God Jamlu, a seer has asked the locals to shut down all the guest houses and restaurants and focus on protecting the local culture and traditions. 

Influence from foreign cultures and even from outside their community is not to be encouraged.

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 “The deity did not want any of the villagers to rent out their property for running guest houses and restaurants. Those violating his orders will have to bear the brunt of his curse,” Malana panchayat head Bhagi Ram told Hindustan Times.

The premium quality hash has been long sought by every one who crosses or stays in Malana, not just for pleasure but also to take some back home. 

“Hey, anything you want me to get you from Kasol? Jackets, rad PJs, woven sweaters?”

“Dude, just get me some Malana cream, man!”

Yep, one of the most sought after souvenir too. 

But if we think about it honestly, should this really come as a surprise? 

With the beautifully mighty River Parvati flowing threw these mountains, Malana is a sight to behold. But all you would probably hear about it is that is a stoner’s hub, a drug-rich land that promotes narcosis. 

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Tourists have made the village of Kasol into a hippie town, with trippy music flowing out of every second cafe, littered streets, and an aura of senselessness that doesn’t befit the beauty of the place. Once known for fashioning baskets, slippers, ropes from hemp, the locals then turned to hash cultivation when foreign tourists taught them how to extract the resin from cannabis.

Located in the Parvati Valley, around 593 acres in Malana is under cannabis cultivation, which produced over 12,000 kg of hashish in 2016. 

Well, that’s about to change now. And how!

Best of luck scoring now, stoners. 

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