26 Questions To Ask Someone On A First Date That Will Reveal Quite A Few Red Flags

Anjali Awasthi

First dates can be complicated and, you better be prepared for it! Redditors revealed the little things they spotted on a first date that were instant red flags.

1. “So why did your last relationship end? I know it’s breaking one of the three dating rules to not speak of politics, religion, or ex’s but I think it’s a great indication seeing how the person reacts to the question, and hear their side of things.”-  willsbma   

2. “Anything related to independency for example –

What are your views of your partner taking vacations with friends? 
 -Working a lot? (to achieve their goal whether is money wise or career wise) 
 -Going out with friends 
 – wearing certain clothes (if you are into wearing tight clothing or short clothing and you feel the most beautiful and confident in, this is a question you must definitely ask) 
 – Having friends who are the opposite gender? You don’t want a narcissist control freak, so questions like this can save your time”. – mile978

3. “Say no to something they suggest. Anything small. How they react to a small no can tell you a lot. Big kerfuffle because you don’t want to go to that restaurant, or drink that wine? Imagine their reaction to you saying no to something bigger if the relationship goes that way. Best, healthiest relationships I’ve had have been with people who’ve respected the no well, asked open ended, well what do you want instead?”- GinjaJaz 

4. “Do you and your family see each other much? Sounds pretty innocent and it is for normal people, but if they go on a huge long tirade about their family then they obviously have issues that they haven’t dealt with”. – TruthOf42

5. “Ask them how they feel about psychiatrists. If they’ve seen one, they might talk about their mental disorders or diagnoses. Which can help you when you’re talking to them and such. And if they say something like “mental illness doesn’t exist!” or “psychiatrists are just perpetuating this made-up PrObLeM” then you might not want to date then again”. – Grey_Is_Insane

6. “Look, obviously Covid is probably going to come up in conversation, so you could easily slip in a question like, “so, did you get any reaction when you got your vaccine shot?”…. then you can talk about your experience, etc. … It sounds like just polite conversation, and based on how they react… you can act accordingly”. –  Wowsa_8435

7. “I’m trans, so it’s kind of a must for me to ask about their opinion on trans people so I don’t get murdered. But in general, even if you’re straight, you should ask their opinion on LGBT rights. Homophobes and transphobes tend to be dicks in general tbh.” – Sparklypuppy05

8. “Ask about pets!” –  shadowyassassiny ·

9. “When you feel disconnected from your partner, how do you usually fix things?” This is a very revealing question, but sounds simple enough. A lot of insight can come from this question. When people feel disconnected from their partner, different courses of action can be taken.” – NeonsStyle  

10. “Do you prefer working alone, or with others?” This question seems harmless enough, but what you’re really asking is, “Do you play well with others?” If they’re a controlling person, they’re either going to prefer working alone, or they’re going to try to lead the others. This is a sign that if they’re in a relationship, they might try to run the show”.  NeonsStyle

11. “What are you like when you don’t get your way?” Huge question, because how you handle losing is a direct reflection of who you really are, deep down. If someone pouts and sighs, then gives up and lets it go, it’s normal. On the other hand, if someone gets resentful, brings the incident up continuously, or shows anger, and tries to convince the other person to give them what they want, they might be a little too controlling”.  NeonsStyle

12. “Admitting when you’re wrong is difficult, wouldn’t you agree?” Again, this particular question reveals how uncomfortable being wrong actually makes them feel. Someone with a controlling personality won’t enjoy admitting they’re wrong, because that means they weren’t in control of a situation they thought they could handle. It admits defeat. Chances are, they’ll try to cover up the question by changing the subject”. – NeonsStyle

13. “Would you say you’re trustworthy?” This is a tough question. Everyone wants to be considered trustworthy, but not everyone is. In fact, it’s easier to find people who aren’t trustworthy. Now, when asked this question, both controlling people, and laid-back people, will probably answer yes. The difference is that the laid-back people will leave it at that, while the controlling people will bring up examples to prove their trustworthiness. Neither reaction is wrong, or right—it’s just a reaction. [Read: 5 unique traits that make a person trustworthy and reliable]”.  NeonsStyle

14. “Just listening, if they constantly complain how shitty there life is and blames others for all there failures. They can’t take responsibility for there own actions.. everything is everyones fault but there’s .. big red flags”. – BidDefiant9559 

15.”Not a question, but if you are out for dinner or drinks, how the treat the server is usually a pretty good indicator of what kind of person they are”. – Jealous-Network-8852 ·

16.”I usually just let people talk. You can pretty much tell all you need to know from Someone without even having to really ask. That, and learn to read body language”. – Benjaminanderson117 

17. “People love talking about themselves as a rule, ask general open ended questions and listen”. – DaRealBangoSkank ·

18.”Ex jokes. If they get intense, I’m getting cautious”. – ExcellentCattle602 

19. “Can you put your phone down?” – BrownEggs93

20. “When they ask you a personal question, you answer, and then respond “what about you?” Usually if there’s avoidant/little response that’s a red flag in and of itself”. –  AicotheHero 

21. “After dating a woman for about a month, I asked her what some of her life goals were. “Now that I have you, I don’t have anymore goals” was her response. Yeah, nope”. – Omniwing 

22. “Lol looking for red flags is in itself a red flag. Try actually enjoy the first date and reflect on it later – message back and forth after the date for the post analysis”. – IAmJohnny5ive 

23. “If someone asked me an interview question on a first date that would be my red flag about them”. –  look2thecookie ·

24. “I like to lay out all of my red flags in the first few contacts. If she sticks around that’s a huge red flag to me”. – Hour-Degree4252 ·

25. “I’ don’t fish for red flags but I’ll say if someone won’t stop talking about their “horrible” ex on the date, it means they’re not over their ex”. – PayYourBiIIs

 26. “If any date started asking me the questions posted here that’s enough red flags for me. Bye”. – Little_Hobbitt 

What red flags do you know about? Let us know in the comment section.

Also Read: Funny Date Ideas

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