We’re back to that mushy, overwhelming time of the year again.
As winter starts fading out, the dying chill is joined by the warm glow of love, come 14 February.
I can literally see the whole town turning red before my eyes.
Every market square shimmers with decorations. Malls run ‘+1/V Day’ schemes at every second store. Restaurants offer couple discounts. Archies gets buzzing like a beehive. Florists stock up and brace themselves for orders.
Business really goes up for these guys as no one holds back on Valentine’s Day. It’s the day for celebration and extravagance.
In all parts of the world, lovers secretly plan grand surprises for their partners. They put in a hell lot of effort and money. Be it a holiday for two or a spa appointment, a dinner date or a shopping spree, it’s the occasion to go all out.
When the ‘designated day’ to express affection to your partner arrives, it must be perfect.
But I beg to differ.
I’d rather save myself from being fooled by a concept based on theories that were never really proven.
Do most of us even know the origin of Valentine’s Day? Or why it is what it is?
Did we ever give a big enough shit to find out?
I don’t think so. Mostly, people vaguely know that it was named after some saint(s) nobody knows much about. The concept stems from myths and completely unreliable information that can’t be traced down to facts.
So technically, we have no idea why we go into such frenzy when February begins.
A friend called last week and asked about what he should get for his girlfriend. I gave him a few ideas and right before hanging up, I asked for fun, “Hey, do you know why we celebrate Valentine’s Day?”
He didn’t know.
More interestingly, he didn’t seem to care.
Yet, there he was, running around, trying to get all those fancy presents in order. Isn’t that funny?
Are we blindly doing something just because the rest of the world is doing it?
I fail to understand why it’s such a ‘thing’ in the first place!
I get celebrating a birthday because you were born on that day, or an anniversary because you were married on that day. Such occasions make sense.
Valentine’s Day, on the other hand, is a cultural phenomenon without a spine. It started spreading across the globe in the 14th century.
It’s 2017 now and we’re still following the ‘rules’ of a random, exported idea that just doesn’t seem to expire.
I have successfully cringed every single time I received a “Haapppy Valentine’s Daaay!!!” message in my lifetime.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t spared from the lame forwards even if I was single.
Oh and Valentine’s Day is the absolute worst for those who are single. It’s a bloody curse. Perfectly decent human beings are made to feel like shit.
You’re not sharing candlelight with someone? You’re not being showered with gifts? You’re not even getting laid? You’re a loser, a loner and a loveless creature.
Hide in your sorry hellhole till the next morning or DIE.
Tsk tsk.
Valentine’s Day is just so painfully forced.
How is this day any more special than any other day with my partner?
It’s not. I’m definitely not circling any digits in red on my calendar.
Why should I do that when I can make him feel wanted and loved whenever I want? I’ve got 365 days in a year, love.
I can book a table at his favourite restaurant on a Monday. I can gift him something nice without a reason. I can make him breakfast in bed if I wake up first.
I’d rather do these things when they’re least expected, not when they’re supposed to be done, such as on V Day.
For me, an element of genuine surprise and love is so much more turning on than these forced romantic rituals.
No wonder I start gagging when I look at hearts bursting with confetti, teddy-shaped chocolates or ‘forever’ key chains.
I mean, what good is a greeting card? Someone wrote something and you passed on that person’s words to your better half.
I once knew a guy who wrote greeting cards for a living in college and hated every second of it. He told me his colleague once wrote a famous card about the ‘essence of love’ – right after cheating on his girlfriend. It sold like hot cakes.
So, all the men and women who were shedding tears of emotion while reading his words were basically living a big, fat lie.
Honestly, I’d prefer leaving a sassy good morning note on the fridge for my man. That would be so much more personal and real.
I think love is in the air everyday anyway. It’s in the smallest, most wonderful things we do in relationships.
When you cook for each other or head to the nearby café for a coffee in pyjamas, when you laugh over a joke or cry over a movie, when you fix each other’s hair or make up after a fight.
I’ve been spending Valentine’s Day just like any other day of the week, month or year since as long as I can remember. The ‘vibe’ of the day never charmed me.
And I will enjoy many incredible, memorable, maybe even over-the-top experiences with my lover in the future…
Just not on Valentine’s Day.