“Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with.”
… said Charlotte York, in Sex And The City: Season 4, Episode 1.
The above quote is just one of the many reasons why I hail the show as every modern young woman’s little hand book on life, love and, most of all, friendships.
And, truth be told, no other TV or web series has come quite that close to home.
Through men, monotony and marriage; the one thing that always stayed the same was their unwavering friendship.
And while each one of them have to go through their own private share of tribulations – Samantha’s cancer, Miranda’s pregnancy, Charlotte’s divorce and Carrie’s life constantly being a mess; they get through it with a little help from their friends.
At some point, we befriended Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda. For all of them, in their own, individualistic ways, taught us about life – men, love, sex, commitment, career, sexism and just about everything else there is to learn in this, otherwise, mundane life.
When Carrie just moved to the big city of New York, we connected with her small town big dreams spirit.
When Charlotte believed in true love, commitment and marriage that would last an eternity, you couldn’t help but say ‘Amen, Sister‘.
When Miranda had to constantly fight the gender prejudice at her firm and in her career, along with men who perceived women to be a certain way, it angered the whole lot of us.
And when Samantha was our inner spirit Goddess who knew exactly what she wanted – from life, men and sex.
We were every single one of these characters; at different points of time.
Their core strengths and values were poles apart from one another; but, somehow, that’s how the magic of their friendship worked for each other – all their differences united them as one pact, no; clique.
As individuals, they bettered themselves and, as friends, they bettered each other. And that’s what friendships are about.
It’s not about finding similar people; but, like-minded individuals who have minds and opinions of their own.
It’s the different schools of thought and attitudes that add to one’s own life, after all. And that’s exactly what Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte essentially did for each other.
It wasn’t about going home with a man at the end of every day; finding the ideal man to spend the rest of their lives with, or fitting in at all.
Sex And The City, through its six definitive seasons took us through a journey – nay, a roller coaster ride – of friendships through time.
The show taught us the importance of ‘inter-friend-tions’ – an intervention conducted by one’s friend(s) to shed a moment of much needed clarity in one’s life.
From Carrie having an affair with Big while she was with Aidan, to her kissing Aidan years later after she was married to Big…
From Samantha’s gay encounter with Maria to her relationship with Jared…
From Miranda’s denial of feelings for Steve to her getting back to him…
And from Charlotte’s choice of getting married to her choice of converting to Judaism…
Every life-altering moment came with friendly banter and discussion among the four women – through telephone conversations, dinners and delis.
Sex And The City was about four friends acting like necessary mirrors for each other through various stages in life.
The best part about it? It wasn’t a sob fest on women, like most Indian series back then and even today.
It mirrored our own frustrations – with our own girl friends, when we felt ignored, misunderstood or mistaken; with our lives.
It gave us ways to deal with our issues; even if it meant vegging out in front of a screen watch reruns of SATC, muttering ‘same‘, with every relatable incident and dialogue.
If you had more than one girl friend, you had – at some point or another; vocally, or subconsciously – defined our friends as Carries, Samanthas, Charlottes and Mirandas.
And sometimes, we were all of them.
Thanks to these four women and SATC, we learned to do more than just complain about our existences; we aspired to be and do more.
Sex And The City made women powerful. And more importantly, it made women friendships a powerful force to reckon with.
It taught women, the world over that, no man, boss, or kid can come in the way of a bond between women.
It taught us to band together; even if it meant just to talk over repeated glasses of Cosmopolitans and Dirty Martinis. It made the idea of women drinking alcohol acceptable; even if it was only in certain strata.
It got the conversations going – around sex, night-outs, beauty, babies, men, diets, careers and what constituted as ‘bad vs good women’.
And that’s why, 14 years after the last episode aired on TV, we continue to go back to Sex And The City marathons.