Have you ever fallen for someone who didn’t live in the same city, the same country as you? Yes? Oh, hey. Me too.
And while falling in love sounds like a beautiful feeling, apparently the fact that it’s with someone who doesn’t live in the same city as you is supposed to mean the relationship would not work out.
Or at least that’s what my friends told me.
The first few weeks with my new-found “friend” were exciting and the adrenaline rush I felt at the time was unmatched. I would tell my friends about all the new developments only to be warned,
“Do not fall for this guy. He doesn’t even live here!”
Okay. I’ll try, but who are we kidding? This was love. He was now, officially my boyfriend.
My friends honestly had a good laugh teasing me about this unconventional “relationship” that was bound to fail.
Because when has a long-distance relationship ever worked?
But I was unaffected. And really happy.
While not entirely wrong, the relationship still blossomed, thanks to the various modes of communication.
There were sleepless night, full of conversations, really poor jokes that both of us, for some reason, found extremely funny and then there was that — the hope to see each other one day. The plans we would make to try every café in the city the next time he visits.
During the time we dated both of us shifted cities, in fact, countries. And it was an experience like no other. Sure, long-distance was not easy. Nothing like your typical relationship where you’d be meeting every day.
But that was a good thing. And this is when I realised my friends were wrong. Getting into a serious relationship in your early twenties meant no space.
Shudder.
At a time in life when you are finding yourself, not meeting every few days gave both of us more time to ourselves.
It gave me a chance to live independently and find myself and figure out who I am and what I want in my early twenties. It was a win-win situation.
Eventually, the endless phone calls became comfortable and involved regular updates about one’s day. I knew I had the day to myself and could always count on him to be there when the day got rough.
Oh, our jokes got better too.
Meeting occasionally was like the-event-of-the-month. The excitement was unmatched, just like the beginning of our ‘honeymoon period’.
The happiness to see each other doubled, every passing meeting.
And once the trip to each others’ cities was over and we got the much-needed break from our daily lives, we could go back to our routines fresh and happy.
A long-distance relationship gives you more time to yourself, time you can utilise to be far more productive than normal while still have the support of a partner.
Although, just like any other relationship, our relationship had its own struggles too.
There were times when I wanted him next to me, even if it was to spend a day doing nothing. There were times when the WhatsApp videos were frozen and all we could see and hear were blurred faces with broken voices.
Solving some fights would definitely have been easier had we been face-to-face, but hanging up the phone (for the 5th time in a row) has its own charm, no?
But eventually, with occasional discomfort and annoyance, we both came out strong and the minor struggles were dealt with.
We have been in a relationship for over four years now and continue to comfortably live in different cities.
We are also, happily engaged.
I’m so glad I decided to go ahead with this and not succumb to my friends’ silly norms that have declared long-distance relationships as a failure waiting to happen.
Sure, it wasn’t easy, but it was worth it.
All images have been sourced from pexels.com