I have stopped being surprised by the duplicity of morality in our society. People love to watch porn, but will judge the porn actors for their profession. Depending on our societal convenience, we hush things up.
On this Reddit thread, children of pornstars reveal, how their parents’ profession affected their lives.
1. “My middle school banned my parents from coming to my graduation/promotion because it was ‘inappropriate’ to have them there.”
2. “It was not that memorable. I didn’t know until I was older that she did old-school playboy type stuff. I was shocked when I learned about it but since I never really knew as a kid it didn’t affect me all the much.”
3. “I went to 3 high schools in 3 states. The ‘I know your mom from somewhere’ got really old really fast. Caused plenty of fights. The ‘can I have her porn star name’ still hasn’t ended, and she stopped in 2000. So many drugs, so much alcohol. I didn’t have a mom. It was horrid.”
4. “I didn’t even know until I was around 15, so it didn’t affect me before that honestly. My mom moved on to a non-porn line of work so it’s not like I grew up near it or really grew up while she was still in the industry or anything like that. Also, she’s not one of the extremely popular ones, that a ton of people would know so she most likely wouldn’t get recognized on the street. My cousin was actually the one who told me and I confirmed it with my mom later on. Pretty awkward for me to say the least.”
5. “I taught a kid who was the son of an adult film actress. The kid didn’t want to talk about it. The mom was amazing, absolutely the parent you wanted to deal with as a teacher. She clearly prioritized her kids’ educations, was heavily involved in school fundraisers, would bring teachers gifts at parent-teacher conferences. I doubt the other parents knew her career alter-ego.
The one time the boy and his friend talked about it in front of me, he said he’d only watch porn featuring actresses who didn’t belong to his ethnic group so he wouldn’t accidentally stumble upon his mother.”
7. “I didn’t know what my mom did growing up. It wasn’t until I was a teenager that my siblings told me because they were tired of waiting for me to figure it out on my own.
It definitely messed with me. I was pretty embarrassed not figuring it out sooner… I have a jaded view of sex work because of my mom. If it’s really okay, why did she have to lie about it most of my life? I feel like I never really knew her. That her life choices put up a wall between us that never came down.”
7. “My mother-in-law was in the adult industry for a stint in the 90s. My husband was too young to realize it, just thought that mom had a lot of cool outfits at the time. I’m not sure when he found out, but she’s open about it. All of her boys have respect for her for doing it, she was feeding them all on her own without assistance and that’s honestly at the heart of it what a good mother does. She’s a rock star to us for taking what she had and making sure her boys were taken care of.”
8. “A living hell.”
9. “For me it was a breeze. Lavish lifestyle, a lot of money and always always always vacations everywhere I wanted to go, I always loved my dad for this.”
10. “My mom was a relatively famous porn star back in Ireland in the 90s. A hand full of lads teased me for it slightly but no one really cared. I moved to the United States at 12 and no one knew. Honestly didn’t affect me much.”
11. “My mother was in the industry before I was born and actually continued after I was… I always remember her getting recognized by mostly guys everywhere we went. I guess she was pretty popular for a while. Well, I had no idea that’s what she did for work until one of my friends showed me a video while we were at school. Worst day of my life. Pretty sure she’s still alive but I completely cut contact with her after I confronted her about everything. I was 16 and that was 13 years ago.”
12. “My mom was a pornstar. But it was when I was a child. 2 years ago one of my close friends found her video somehow and showed it to me. I was so shocked. I didn’t know how to react and whether I should confront her or not… But she raised me well. She is a beautiful kind mom.”
It’s 2022! Let’s remove the stigma around porn and porn actors.