Leonardo DiCaprio Just Won An Oscar, And Quite Frankly, Here’s Why It Sucks

Yes, believe it or not, there are some of us, hidden in the deep corners of the Interwebs who aren’t exactly dancing with joy at Mr. DiCaprio’s win at the just concluded Academy Awards. And no, it has nothing to do with our love and/or understanding of films. We are the silent majority of web crawlers who have made every little ‘online pop culture thingy’ part of our daily lives. We feed on memes and have the deepest conversations about bacon in obscure web-forums. 

And we hate the fact that DiCaprio won the Oscar, even though we love the dude. Why? Read on.

1. A legendary meme just died

2. We can’t say ‘Leo doesn’t care about the Oscars’ anymore

That argument just fell flat on its head with that acceptance speech. Y U do this to us, Leo?

3. We just lost our hero.

Let’s accept it. We, the frustrated lot, the people who don’t feel appreciated at work, who don’t get noticed by the ones we like, who don’t have much luck finding love, we don’t go home with anyone on weekends, feel that the world hates us – kept telling ourselves “It’s fine, Leonardo DiCaprio doesn’t have an Oscar, so that makes it okay.” He gave us hope. Well, not any more.

4. And yes, now we’ll have to look for a new symbol of hope. Who can it be?

Okay, let’s line up some other unlucky fellas, shall we? 

Could it be Gary Oldman, the other guy who has the Internet’s favour when it comes to not winning an Academy Award?

Or will it be Brad Pitt, who never won an Oscar for acting? The dude’s so handsome, for years people overlooked how great an actor he is.

Or could it be our favourite pirate, Johnny Depp, who has a body of work like no other?

Whoever it may be, it’s not Dicaprio. Thanks but no thanks, Leo!