So here’s a list of things rich people do or spend money on, that poor folks like me can never imagine. Don’t be surprised if you detect a jealous tone here.

1. They love registries, where they can have their names next to the most luxurious items without always physically possessing the product.

The thing about most rich people is, they have to do almost everything ‘rich people style’. Part of being super rich comes with the satisfaction that you get to have your name on rare, expensive, luxury items. This is where registries come in. Like when the super-rich people want to pre-order a rare car, they usually go to duPont Registry. Say, a super-rich person wants to buy a rare diamond from another super-rich seller, they approach a similar registry, which then arranges the transactions. But it’s not like the new owner is going to display the diamond on his coffee table. It’ll still be in a secure vault, most likely, the same one where it existed earlier. But the registry reflects the new owner’s name. Win, I guess.

2. AAirpass – Pay $250,000 and fly unlimited first class on this airline for all your life

Back in 1981, if you had $250,000 and an extra $150,000 for a partner, you could fly first class in any American Airlines flight throughout your life. By 2004, this price had gone up to $3 million and then later, American Airlines discontinued the “unlimited” part of the deal for new members. Over the years, 66 people had subscribed to it.

3. The super rich have their own version of e-Bay and Craigslist

When you’ve reached Uncle Scrooge levels of richness, you don’t wait around for Flipkart discount deals or great bargains on eBay. One of the luxury e-commerce sites like to visit is JamesEdition.com, where you can buy rich people things like jets, yachts and even real estate. They even listed the freaking Batmobile on their site.

4. High-end Watch Clubs – Yes, even rich people rent

Some rich people are rich because they make clever decisions. For example, they don’t always buy assets with depreciating value, but they lease/rent them. When it comes to fancy watches, they prefer renting them for special occasions from sites like BorrowedTimeWatches.com. And it makes total sense if you think about it – you get to impress the world with your bling, without paying shit loads of money.

5. Black Russian cigarettes with golden filters

If you’re a rich smoker and you want to brag about how loaded you are, what you smoke also matters. And thanks to the trade embargoes against Cuba that existed all these years, you can’t just flaunt the illegal stash of Cuban cigars you’ve scored. So you turn towards cigarettes that most other people would only dream of. Sobranie is one of the most famous luxury tobacco names in the business. And guess what? Their filters are made out of gold foil.

6. Private Jet timeshares – So that expensive jets don’t remain underused

The super-rich love their private jets. But even they know that owing one and letting using it only about once or twice a month is a huge waste, especially when you can rent, lease or co-own these beauties. Sites like NetJets let you do that.

7. They have secretaries who have secretaries

How easy do you think it is to get in touch with Bill Gates? Do you have to get in touch with his secretary first? What if the secretary has a secretary? This comment from a Reddit post shines some more light on that.

8. Only the super rich buy stocks in companies like Berkshire Hathaway

Berkshire Hathaway is a conglomeration of many companies and it’s headed by Chairman, President and CEO Warren Buffett. If you’re thinking of buying shares of this company, you need to either be super-rich or have time-traveling capabilities. Yes, last we checked the price of one share was around $1,97,500.00.

9. Supremely expensive phones – beyond functionality and design

When us lesser mortals are buying a new phone, we usually go for functionality and/or design, but what do you do when you already have all the latest ones? Well, how about a gold-plated iPhone or a Vertu phone where the ringtones are special editions of classical tracks performed by the London Symphony Orchestra?

10. Kidnap Insurance – Because a loaded person can afford a badass rescue team

Being super-rich also means that you might end up in the radar of kidnapping rings that dabble in the art of earning quick bucks through ransom. Which is why some loaded people buy kidnap insurance when they travel to places that are considered risky. And no, it’s not always that when you get kidnapped, and your insurance just pays for your ransom. Sometimes, they just send a badass SWAT- like rescue team to get you out.

11. Submarine sports car – Because there are no traffic cops underwater

If you’re bored with buying your run-of-the-mill sports cars, you might want to follow the footsteps of people who buy fully functional aquatic sports car that can be driven on ocean beds. Because great white sharks are preferable to red lights, right?

12. Alcohol bottled after being poured on women’s breasts

For some reason, some people like the idea of drinking (or being seen with) alcohol that has been spilled on women’s (selected models) breasts. Don’t ask. And because we live in a capitalist world, someone decided to cater to that crowd. G-Spirits is an alcohol brand that bottles vodka, whisky and other drinks that have been poured over breasts of models. They even specify details about the models and talk about the unique ‘flavour’ they add to the drink.

13. Gold pills that turn shit into gold – Because everyone deserves the Lannister experience

You can’t just be super-rich and shit out normal people poop, right? (Yes, we live in a crazy world) These pills that cost $425 a pop and actually makes your poop gold colored. Yep, for the man who has everything, all that remains is gold poop. Have $425 on you? Now you can feel like a Lannister.

14. Rent a disabled person, and ruin a great service in Disneyland

Okay, this one’s pretty sad. There was a time when disabled people and their families didn’t have to wait in line to get tickets in Disneyland. They could just skip the crowd and head straight for the entry and get the tickets there. But then some people with extra money in their pockets decided to abuse the system. How? They rented disabled people to accompany them. Yes, this cost a lot of money but these were people who could easily afford it. In 2013, Disneyland changed its policies to remove this service for the disabled. So yeah, a few rich people ruined it for others.

15. Art Insurance – Provides a team to rescue expensive art in times of emergency

Imagine your grand mansion burning. And since you own a mansion, you also own some rare and expensive artwork hanging on the walls. But do you run to save your kids and partners or do you save the art? Don’t worry. You don’t have to be that douche. You buy some art insurance that ensures that in case of emergencies, there’s a team ready to rescue your expensive art from damage. Ah, to be rich.

16. Professional picture hanger – Yes, it’s a legit job

And speaking of pieces of art hanging on your walls, let us tell you that there are professional art hangers, people whose job it is to come over to your place and hang artwork in the most perfect manner. Pictured below is professional picture hanger, John Verhoeven in Sydney.

17. Psychological wealth counseling – Because rich people worry too much

There are banks that hire psychologists for rich patrons who are worried because they have too much money. Yes, that is a ‘rich person problem’ of the highest order, but it apparently exists. According to wealth psychologist, Jamie Traeger-Muney, “wealth is still a taboo in our culture”. Come to think of it, it actually makes sense. When you’re that rich you don’t have too many people around to talk to about your problems. But yes, to a lot of us, that’s a problem we wouldn’t mind having.

18. Doomsday-proof luxury underground housing – For rich people only

There are some rich folks who are scared of not-so-rich people gunning for their wealth once the world economy collapses, or when the world suffers from a nuclear winter. To protect themselves, the super-rich are apparently building Dommsday-proof luxury housing underground in some parts of the world. The Vivos Europa One in Germany is one such project. They’re also building an underground luxury condo somewhere in the Kansas Prairie. Do the elites know something we don’t?

19. Go to a doctor? What are we? Plebs?

We’ve heard the term ‘concierge medicine’ where the patient and/or his/her family pays a physician an annual fee, to be the ‘go to’ doctor in case of medical emergencies. Some rich people have taken that to a whole new level. Some wealthy families have emergency rooms installed right inside their houses. Because waiting in line to get the medical care in the world should only be a thing of the plebs, right?

20. Carve your name out so big on your private island that the aliens know how rich you are

There’s wealthy and then there’s Arab Sheikh wealthy. Sheikh Hamad Bin Hamdan Al Nahyan, a member of the royal family carved his name on a private island he owns in such a way, that it could be seen from outer space . He later got it removed. But it still proves, carving your name in such a huge scale is the new ‘peeing to mark one’s territory.’

And, courtesy of Reddit, this Russian billionaire’s bachelor party.

Not sure if this actually happened, but it’s quite something nonetheless.

The super rich will never fail to amaze me.