If you were born in a typical Indian household, Tuesdays held a special place in your heart—or your mother’s heart, to be more precise. One day in the entire week, you are not allowed even to have non-vegetarian jokes.
Well, as it happens, we do have such thoughts, and what better day to share them with you and corrupt your socio-religious morals than a Tuesday?
1. A little boy goes to school but brings in a cat with him. The teacher asks him “Why did you bring your cat to school?” The little boy replies, “Well, I heard my daddy telling Mommy when the kids leave I’m gonna eat that pu**y up.”
2. A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. The cashier asks, “Do you want a bag?” The guy says, “No. She’s not that ugly.”
3. Q: What is pink, goes in hard and dry and come out soft and wet? A: Bubble Gum.
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4. Q: What’s long hard and full of seamen? A: A submarine.
5. Q: What do you call a teenage boy who doesn’t masturbate? A: A liar.
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6. Q: What do you call the useless piece of skin on a dick? A: The man.
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7. Q: What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom? A: Condoms have evolved: They are not so thick and insensitive anymore.
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8. I went to a Halloween Party dressed as a chicken. Met a girl dressed as an egg. A question as old as time was answered. The chicken.
9. I texted my boss, “What’s the difference between your daughter and this morning?” He replied, “I don’t know, what?” I said, “I’m not coming in this morning.”
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10. What do you call a dinosaur who just had sex? A Mega-sore-ass.
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11. A man and woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, “Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!”. The woman says, “Me too, you’ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!”
12. My boss walked straight up to my desk as I was watching porn today and said, “Do you think I pay people to do that?” “Probably,” I replied, “You’re not exactly the best-looking bloke in the world.”
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13. A boy told his mom, “I couldn’t sleep last night so I went into your room. Why were you jumping up and down on Daddy?” His mom said, “Well dear, I was pushing the air out of him.” The boy replied, “Oh then you’re wasting your time. The lady next door blows him back up every day.”
If your dharam has been bhrasht after reading this, we do not give two shits!
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