We know that India is a really hospitable country. “Atithi Devo Bhava” and all that. Our country is good at tons of other stuff too. But I don’t think we are a superhero friendly nation. Why do you think Ra.One flopped? Anyways, the reasons we’ve not had much Bollywood superheroes is because everyone knows a superhero would just not be able to survive here. Now take Batman for instance. I think this what he’ll have to deal with if he was in India.
1. People would make fun of his name.
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2. People would also make fun of his costume.
Dude, why do you have your mom’s saree on your back? Are you drying it for her?
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3. He would need to keep 3 or 4 spare Bat-Suits handy at all times.
It’s going to get really hot and sweaty in that suit, no matter which part of the country he’s in.
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4. He’ll have to do without the privacy of a bat cave.
Because his neighbours would always keep dropping by, asking for a cup of sugar or “dahi ka jaaman.”
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5. He won’t be able to fight crime from 9 to 11 in the morning and 6 to 8 in the evening.
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6. He’ll have to learn 18 different languages.
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7. He’ll have to work with ACP Pradyuman.
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8. And instead of Robin, he’d have to use Daya as a side-kick.
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9. He’ll have to make do with the sleepy Ramu Kaka instead of the refined and sophisticated Alfred.
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10. He’ll have to be a politically correct crime-fighter.
With Arnab Goswami following your every move and asking questions for which the nation needs answers, Batman will have to be very smart about this indeed.
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11. He’ll have to be look-out for dengue & malaria.
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12. He’ll have a tough time hiding his true identity.
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13. He’ll have to work without all his fancy gadgets.
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14. Eventually, he’ll learn to shamelessly scratch his crotch in public.
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